Our Enemy: Felis Catus, sub. Solivertiator, the Garden Destroying Cat
Oh, What Now?? You go to check on your new carrot sprouts and to your horror you find... CAT TURDS. This! Is! War! The best use for a cat that pollutes a gnome's garden is as a test payload for a small trebuchet. Other uses include post hole filler, alligator bait and indoor pet. The authors of this blog make no moral judgment on the particular use any individual gnome may put a naughty cat to, but it is recommended that any gnome who finds itself in a position to decide the disposition of a destructive, ill-mannered, garden-polluting, why-on-earth-was-this-thing-ever-domesticated, no good cat check their local laws and regulations before taking any action. Caretakers of cats may wisely choose to keep their feline companions indoors, both for the safety of the animal and the avoidance of criminal charges for garden gnomes who justifiably take matters, and little Sylvester's fate, into their own murderous hands. Moreover, it may be worth considering the ethics of keeping a ca...